To pray is simply to talk to God honestly, as a child talks to a father who loves them. You don’t need special words, a church building or a lot of time: you can tell Him what you’re thankful for, what you’re sorry for and what you need, in your own plain words. Jesus even gave His followers a short pattern to start with, and you can use it today.
If you have never prayed before, or haven’t prayed in years, it’s normal to feel awkward. Here is a gentle walk through the questions most beginners ask.
What is prayer?
Prayer is conversation with God. Sometimes it’s praise, sometimes it’s a request, sometimes it’s a single sentence whispered on the way to work. Underneath all of it is a relationship. Christians believe that through Jesus, God welcomes us as His children, so we can come to Him the way a son or daughter comes home.
That’s why the New Testament keeps calling God “Father” in prayer. The letter to the Hebrews puts the invitation this way:
Let us then approach the throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need.
Hebrews 4:16
Notice the words “with confidence.” Because of what Jesus has done, the door is already open, and you are welcome to walk through it.
Do I need special words to pray?
No. Jesus actually warned against trying to impress God with a flood of words:
And when you pray, do not babble on like pagans, for they think that by their many words they will be heard. Do not be like them, for your Father knows what you need before you ask Him.
Matthew 6:7–8
God isn’t waiting for the right formula or the perfect tone of voice. One of the shortest prayers in the Bible comes from a tax collector in one of Jesus’ parables, a man who wouldn’t even lift his eyes to heaven. All he said was, “God, have mercy on me, a sinner!” (Luke 18:13). Jesus said that man went home justified before God (Luke 18:14).
Old words like “thee” and “thou” are fine if you love them, and so is everyday speech. Talk to God the way you would talk to someone who already knows everything about you and loves you anyway, because He does.
What should I say when I pray?
The first disciples had the same question. They had watched Jesus pray, and they wanted to learn:
One day in a place where Jesus had just finished praying, one of His disciples requested, “Lord, teach us to pray, just as John taught his disciples.”
Luke 11:1
Jesus didn’t hand them a lecture. He gave them a short prayer:
So Jesus told them, “When you pray, say: ‘Father, hallowed be Your name. Your kingdom come. Give us each day our daily bread. And forgive us our sins, for we also forgive everyone who sins against us. And lead us not into temptation.’”
Luke 11:2–4
You can pray those words exactly as they are, and Christians have done that for two thousand years. You can also use them as a map for your own words. Line by line, the prayer covers most of what a beginner needs to say:
- “Father, hallowed be Your name.” Start with God Himself. Tell Him who He is to you and thank Him for something specific.
- “Your kingdom come.” Ask for His will in your life, your family and the world, before your own plans.
- “Give us each day our daily bread.” Ask for what you need today: work, health, wisdom, patience for a hard conversation.
- “Forgive us our sins.” Be honest about what you’ve done wrong, and let go of what others have done to you.
- “Lead us not into temptation.” Ask for help to stay faithful in the places where you know you’re weak.
We go through each line more slowly in the Lord’s Prayer explained.
Can I bring God my worries?
Yes, and Scripture urges you to. Paul wrote to the church in Philippi:
Be anxious for nothing, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
Philippians 4:6–7
“In everything” leaves nothing out. Big or small, sensible or embarrassing, it can be prayed about. The psalmist says the same thing with a vivid picture: “pour out your hearts before Him” (Psalm 62:8). When you pour out a jug, everything comes out, so tell Him all of what you’ve been carrying.
The Bible also gives you permission to be honest when you’re upset. David once prayed, “How long, O LORD? Will You forget me forever?” (Psalm 13:1). God can handle your questions and your frustration. Bring them to Him instead of hiding them. If worry has a strong grip on you, our Bible verses for anxiety may help, and please talk to a pastor, a counselor or a doctor as well. Asking for help is no failure of faith.
Where and when should I pray?
Anywhere and anytime. Jesus encouraged a private place: “go into your inner room, shut your door, and pray to your Father, who is unseen” (Matthew 6:6). A quiet chair, a bedroom, a parked car or a walk around the block can all become that inner room.
Prayer also fits into the middle of ordinary life. When the Persian king asked Nehemiah what he wanted, the Bible says, “So I prayed to the God of heaven” and then answered the king (Nehemiah 2:4). It was a prayer of a few seconds, in the middle of a conversation. Paul’s short instruction, “Pray without ceasing” (1 Thessalonians 5:17), doesn’t mean staying on your knees all day. It means staying in touch with God as the day goes on.
Still, a regular time helps a habit take root. Many people find the first few minutes after waking are the easiest to protect. If that appeals to you, see how to start your day with prayer. Others prefer to close the day with God, looking back over it and handing it to Him before sleep.
Should I kneel, close my eyes or pray out loud?
In the Bible people pray standing, kneeling, lying face down, with hands lifted and with eyes down. No single posture is required. Closing your eyes can help you shut out distractions, and kneeling can help your body remember who you’re talking to. Choose whatever helps you pay attention.
Praying out loud, even in a whisper, keeps many people from drifting. Writing your prayers in a notebook works well for others, and it gives you a record to look back on when God answers.
What if I don’t know what to say?
Then you are in good company. Paul admitted that we often don’t know how to pray, and he gave this comfort:
In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. For we do not know how we ought to pray, but the Spirit Himself intercedes for us with groans too deep for words.
Romans 8:26
On days when your mind is blank, borrow words. Pray a psalm slowly, line by line. Psalm 23 is a good place to start: “The LORD is my shepherd; I shall not want.” Or simply sit quietly and say, “Lord, I don’t know what to say, but I’m here.” That is a real prayer.
What if God doesn’t seem to answer?
Every person who prays runs into this. Sometimes the answer is yes, sometimes it is no, and often it is “not yet.” Even Jesus, the night before the cross, asked for another way and then added, “Yet not My will, but Yours be done” (Luke 22:42). Over time, prayer shapes what we want, until we can trust God with the answer as well as the request.
Feelings come and go too. Some days prayer will feel warm and close, and other days it will feel like talking to the ceiling. That doesn’t mean God has stopped listening. Jesus told a parable “about their need to pray at all times and not lose heart” (Luke 18:1). Keep going on the dry days. They are part of learning to trust.
Why do Christians pray “in Jesus’ name” and say Amen?
Praying in Jesus’ name means coming to God through Jesus, trusting Him rather than our own goodness to give us a hearing. The phrase reminds us why we’re welcome at all.
“Amen” is a Hebrew word that means something like “it is true” or “so be it.” Saying it is a way of putting your whole weight behind what you’ve just prayed. You can read more in what “Amen” means.
A simple first prayer
If you’d like to begin right now, you can pray these words, or change them to fit your own life:
Father, I’m new at this, and I’m not sure I’m doing it right. Thank You that I can come to You because of Jesus. Thank You for this day and for the people in my life. Forgive me for the wrong I’ve done, and help me forgive those who have hurt me. Here’s what’s on my heart today. Please give me what I need and help me trust You with the rest. Teach me to pray. In Jesus’ name, Amen.
Then come back tomorrow and pray again. Prayer is learned the way any conversation is learned, by having it. Some people find it helps to start each day by hearing a Bible verse before anything else, which is the idea behind Amen Clock: an alarm that reads you a verse and turns off when you say Amen. However you begin, start small, be honest, and keep showing up. God is glad to hear from you.
Amen Clock is a morning alarm that reads you a Bible verse and turns off when you say “Amen” out loud, a simple way to make talking with God the first thing you do each day.
Scripture quotations are from the Berean Standard Bible (BSB), which is in the public domain.